Tuesday, January 22, 2008

I know nothing

This may come as a surprise to those of you younger than 40 that I know nothing (or maybe not since you are still struggling with knowing it all). And for those of you pushing 50 or so, it probably doesn't come as a surprise that I know nothing. Because knowing things is a quirk of youth. Not knowing things is a realization of middle age.

I don't write this with much conviction, because that would imply that I know what I'm talking about. I don't. But I feel what I'm talking about.

It is not as easy as you think to know nothing. I spent years perfecting the illusion of knowing something until I finally believed it myself. But in the past few years I began having doubts that my all encompassing knowledge of everything was real. After all, if I knew everything, I wouldn't think that no one would be stupid enough to vote for Bush for a second term or that reality television was just a passing fad. And knowing everything somehow couldn't explain why I am pushing 50 and still haven't become a best selling author.

Epiphany time! I don't know everything! I know nothing! I don't even know enough not to use an exclamation mark several times in one paragraph!

It is a challenge knowing nothing in a world that values expertise. But I think that experts are just people who think they know too much to know nothing. So I have become more or less comfortable with my nothingness.

In fact, I have nothing more to say.

And I feel good about that.


Karen said...

As someone else who is pushing 50 may I just say that you just confused the hell out of my addled mind and I have no idea what it is you think you don't know, but if I did know what you don't know I'm quite sure I would tell you. But then again....I don't know.

Anonymous said...

So rather than be the next Hemingway or Steinbeck, you're content with being the next Sgt. Schultz.

Naughti Biscotti said...

I'm only 38, so that gives me another 2 years to think I know everything.

Is it wrong to use more than one exclamation point in one sentence? Hmmmmm... I didn't know that.

Well, now that I know THAT, I know EVERYTHING.

Time said...

Nothing to it.

That's funny, I was thinking of Sgt. Schultz when I was writing this. I almost quoted him. He was the ultimate middle manager archtype for plausible deniability. The difference between him and me though is that I really know nothing.

You problably do know everything. But eventually you will see that everything is nothing. You can't pour water into a full glass. :)

Anonymous said...

There's nothing you can know that isn't known.
Nothing you can see that isn't shown.
Nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be.
It's easy.

Anonymous said...

All I know is I can't find my nuts.

Karen said...

Me again. I just came to tell you there is a little something for you over at my blog.

JP (mom) said...

Is someone having an existential crisis? I guess if you were, you wouldn't know it! JP/deb

Anonymous said...

Still stealing other people's material King, eh?

Time said...

Leather Squirrel,
You just aren't looking in the right place.

Thanks so much. That was very touching.

That means nothing to me. :)

Anonymous said...

I started realizing I knew nothing recently too. Maybe its temporary, maybe we get to know it all again when we're 60.

Time said...

I'm not sure I want to know it all again. Knowing nothing goes quite well with being invisible.

Big Ben said...

Would you watch a George Bush reality show about his second term?

Hayden said...

ain't it the truth! I used to know everything and had a polished bit of argument to bolster every opinion.

Now I hesitate, start to say something, think again, and oft as not, pass on without comment.

Time said...

Big Ben,
There is nothing I'd rather not do.

I believe that is precisely it. I no longer can state my opinions with conviction. So I say nothing with conviction :)

Karen said...

Did I dream the "My Life" video that came after this post? I wouldn't be surprised because I have been having the strangest dreams since I gave up the ciggies.

Naughti Biscotti said...

What happened to "100 years"? I thought it was excellent and have been thinking about doing something similiar myself.

Mikey said...

I know I like popcorn. This brings me much comfort. Beyond that, I don't know much.

Oh, and "Hello". Shandi turned me on to your blog. Hope I'm not intruding. :)

Time said...

Gypsy, There you go, dreaming again. :)

You should do a video like "100 years." It's fun to watch the evolution of or lives through changes in our faces. I just wish my own evolution included a few less chins. :)

Welcome Mikey,
Of course you aren't intruding. After all, you like popcorn. :)

BlazngScarlet said...

I once knew it all ..... then I had kids and realized I didn't know jack about squat.
And never will.

Time said...

So it's becoming a parent that wipes away all all makes sense now. :)