Tuesday, November 17, 2015

No, really, now is the winter of my discontent

We've set the clocks back and plunged my morning and my evening commuter in darkness. The cold has returned. The rains pummeled me all weekend and the winds knocked down a section of my fence. So I'd say it is definitely approaching my winter of discontent. Of at least the late fall of major annoyance.

It shouldn't come as a surprise to me that a section of my fence fell down. It has been threatening to do so for several years now. I've cobbled it together with nails, screws and odd bits of metal in an effort to keep it standing as long as possible. But it was old and rotting when we bought the house and now it is beyond mending.

It was all I could do to prop up the sections that fell down so at least it fills the gap in the fence. Now comes the fun of discovering how much it costs to replace a fence. I'm sure I will suffer sticker shock.

God knows I was not graced with the handy man gene. I have made attempts over the years to do minor things. I've replaced toilets and sinks and installed faucets. I've painted. I even paint first house once as well as refinished some hardwood floors. And I've installed tile and vinyl floors.

I plan never to do any of those things again. As Dirty Harry once said, "A man has to know his limitations."

I wish I was handy with tools. I wish I could do wiring and plumbing and repair appliances. I wish I knew what I was looking at when I opened a car hood. But my aptitude has always been with words not working with my hands. I confess I have always felt slightly inadequate because of it. Because in the event of a zombie Apocalypse, it would be helpful to know how to build and repair things instead of how and when to use a semi-colon.

At least I know how to cook even though I rarely get the opportunity anymore. And my being able to cook does little to impress my children since they only eat pizza, hot dogs, scramble eggs and grilled cheese.

Oh well. A horse, a horse! My kingdom for a horse!


Helen Baggott said...

I'm not sure if I'd describe replacing a toilet as a minor challenge. Presumably you succeeded?

Time said...

I was flushed with pride when I was complete.

liz young said...

Replacing a toilet seat IS a doddle - replacing a faucet (tap in uk) is in a whole other league. I am impressed.