There's a light

 

I've decided to mix it up and show designs that I've made for events that I didn't create a t-shirt for (especially since I posted about Matchmaker Day last year at this time and you know how I hate to repeat myself).

I hate to repeat myself, but speaking of mixing it up. It's also National Trail Mix Day.

How does this semi-rejected design represent Trail Mix, you ask? They are snacks dressed up and on the trail to a mixer. I hate it when I have to explain everything.  I bet you Vincent Van Gogh didn't have to explain Starry, Starry Night to anyone.  

But then again, he didn't really sell any paintings until after he died. So we have that in common too.

Don't marsh my mallow...er mellow

 

I can't believe I've been on this National blah, blah, day for more than a year now and already have designs to post for the ones that are coming up again.  Like National Toasted Marshmallow Day.  We need s'more designs like that.

It's also National Beach Day. So I dug up this design featuring me on the beach in Isla Mujeres off the coast of Mexico across from Cancun. It was many, many years ago. I had been at a conference in Atlanta and used it as an opportunity to meet some friends who were staying at Isla Mujeres. The island is about five miles long and less than half a mile wide. I flew into Cancun and took a ferry across to Isla Mujeres. I stayed in a hotel above a place called Pizza Rolando which proclaimed that you had televisions in your room. And indeed there was, it was a portable black and white television that was on a shelf in the closet and had no reception if you plugged it in.

It was an interesting trip. My friends were an older couple -- Jerry and Flora (I won't use their real names). Jerry had been in Vietnam and freaked out a bit when we rented a jeep in Cancun and drove to Coba, an ancient Maya site located in dense tropical forests. He was having flashbacks to Vietnam. Jerry and Flora smoked a lot of pot and had brought some into Mexico (which freaked me out). Years later Jerry told me he used the trip to Coba to make a drug deal that helped finance his early retirement. I was freaked out about that too because if it had gone sideways I could have ended up in a Mexican jail without my black and white television. Jerry and Flora have long since vanished from my life.

Oh well, I got a t-shirt design and memories out of the whole experience. Maybe I'll toast a marshmallow to Jerry and Flora and wish them well.

Showing your true colors

 

It is National College Colors Day.  I couldn't resist posting a design I did awhile back in my Teepublic days that got the ire of the people at Notre Dame, the University, not the church.  Of course it was removed by the weasels at Teepublic. So I created an alternative version that was less religious than the Notre Dame football version.

No one at the church as complained about this one. Victor Hugo can't complain because his works are now public domain. And it is not the first time I've messed around with a post about hunch banks. So I'm free to turn it into a t-shirt (which I did). 

I have a hunch it won't be a big seller. But it might ring a bell for a few.

Sanctuary....sanctuary!
 

Out of the box

 

It's National Red Wine Day! And once again I am shilling this Adult Juice Box design. I think it is funny because I think boxed wine is just fine. But it is kind of the moped of wine. It is fun, but you don't want anyone seeing you with it.

Speaking of boxes. I found this intriguing item at Goodwill yesterday.

It's a simple wooden box that is only about 7 inches across. But it is made entirely of wood, including the clasps and the hinges.

So my guess is that is tramp art. Tramp art is a form of folk woodworking that was done in the US from about the 1870s through the 1940s. It was generally created with scrap wood and simple tools. 

This is a bit more refined and simple from your normal tramp art, but that's what I think it is.  I truly appreciate it and hope to flip it on eBay for major bucks.

I'm just a sentimental kind of person that way.

Taking it in the shorts

 

I may buy a pair of these myself. I do like Tiki stuff and Dizgraceland is near and dear to my heart. So these board shorts would make my day. They aren't that expensive actually. I can't vouch for the quality. But how often would I wear them? Once or twice a year, tops, while on vacation. 

Or I could wear them on my commuter train. I'm old enough that people would just think I'm a touch senile and shake their heads sadly. 

They do that anyway, so I might as well be wearing a pair of Trader Tim's.

Here's what the back looks like:

I'll end with that even though it seems a bit short-sighted. 

Every dog has its day

 

It is National Dog Day! And what better way to celebrate it than to buy your dog a mat to go under its dog food dish. This are flying off the virtual shelf as we speak. People (and presumably their dogs) are eating them up.

Not really.  But I can dream.

A-peeling posts

 

It is National Banana Split Day! I actually wanted to create a design based on the Banana Splits, a 1968 Hanna Barbera kid's show. But it is copyright and the last thing I need is for Printify to cancel my account for violating copyright.

I watched the Banana Splits when I was a kid. I even joined their fan club for some reason.  I sent away for a certificate (which has long vanished or else I would sell it on eBay).  And for some reason I can still remember the them song from the show (One banana, two banana, three banana four. Four bananas make a bunch and so do many more."

I also remember the phrase, "Uh oh, Chongo!" which was the signal that an episode of Danger Island was about to start on the Banana Splits.  I couldn't tell you much about what Danger Island was about. I just remember going around the playground yelling, "Uh oh, Chong!"

Memory is an odd thing. I can't remember 90 percent of my passwords but I can remember the theme sone from the Banana Splits.

This was the other design I worked on for National Banana Split Day.  I don't like it as well. I probably wouldn't be caught dead in it personally. But I'm not too proud to try and sell it. 

Uh oh, Chongo!

Fair trade

I found this at Goodwill. It is a Batak Divination Calendar. Until I found and purchased it, I had no idea what a Batak Divination calendar was. These calendars were traditionally consulted by Batak ritual specialists (datu) to determine auspicious and inauspicious days for farming, travel, ceremonies and other important activities. How it ended up in a Goodwill in Western Washington I don't know. Perhaps the former owner consulted the Batak Divination Calendar.

I have listed the Batak Divination Calendar on eBay at a healthy price. I doubt there will be any takers but I'm in no hurry. I kind of enjoy owning a Batak Divination Calendar. At my next part I may figure out how to work it into the conversation. Perhaps something like, "The other day I was consulting my Batak Divination Calendar from Sumatra to figure out a good date for a colonoscopy." Of course I would have to be invited to a party to bring this up and that rarely happens (perhaps because I bring up colonoscopies). 

But being a thrift store archeologist leads me to find cool things like the Batak Divination calendar and use AI to figure out what the hell it is. I have always enjoyed owning curiosities and oddities. I would have been fine working for Ripley and Ripley's Believe it or Not (believe it or not).  I think I am much better looking than Robert Ripley the founder of Ripley's Believe it or Not.

Apparently having braces was something he didn't believe in. But it may have been why he became interested in freakish things and people. They made him look okay in comparison.

Believe, or not.

Trader Tim

 

I found a Trader Sam's t-shirt when we were in Disneyland a couple of weeks ago. They are kind of hard to find. I didn't actually go to Trader Sam's (the tiki bar at the Disneyland Hotel) but I bought the shirt.  It inspired me to mess with some new designs. Because the reason why I don't sell things is all about me not having the right masthead.

I didn't actually change my store masthead. But I like the Trader's Tim's concept. I may make a shirt because I am a household name and people want to wear shirts that are all about me.

Perhaps that it the crux of the issue about why I don't sell things.

Fly into the light

 

It's National Aviation Day so I dusted off my Rapture Air design and created not only a t-shirt, but a luggage tag as well.

The whole "Jesus is my pilot" came from a sign this guy used to have on his shopping cart that he pushed around campus forty-some years ago when I went to Boise State University. The guy wasn't a student. He was an old dude. Probably the age I am now. But he must have figured a colleg campus was a good place to save sinners.

I figured it would make an interesting tag line for a religious themed airline. I think I originally tried selling the design before Teepublic kicked me to the curb. I don't think I had got around to posting it on Red Bubble before they kicked me to the curb as well.  Regardless, it is now available on my Printify store.  But I'm not overly optimistic that it will be a big seller. My Printify pop up store hasn't been very successful so far. In fact it hasn't been at all successful. 

I'm not sure my lack of success is due to lack of promotion or just a general non-interest in my designs.  I try promoting them on Blue Sky, Instagram, Facebook and Threads but although I've got a few likes here and there, no buyers. 

Maybe I'm not one of the chosen ones. 

Flipping catalogues

 

It is National Mail Order Catalog Day! And to me it represents the inability of people to let go of things that no longer are relevant in the world. I realize some people still like printed things. Clothing catalogues seem to be the most successful. But I don't think they are sustainable. It is so expensive to print and mail catalogs. Why do it when you market can just go to your catalog on their phone or tablet and it costs you a fraction of the price. Plus you can update it quickly and don't get people wanting things from a catalog that is out of date. And they have to go online anyway to order. 

I created a t-shirt anyway because I enjoy irony. If I'm not going to sell any t-shirts I might as well not sell designs I like. It has been the philosophy of my blog for years. I write what I want and readers be damned. It has always worked for me. Helps me avoid being famous and successful.

I am the most successful unsuccessful writer and designer on the Web and proud of it!

When paths cross

 

It's Black Cat Appreciation Day!  I've owned a couple of black cats in my life and both were sweet friends. Not sure how they got a bad rep. But they crossed my path many times and it didn't seem to change my luck substantially. 

But then again I don't believe in luck...good or bad.

On a totally different topic, I picked up a Zushi at an antique store the other day.  And don't feel bad if you have never heard of a Zushi before. Either had I. I'd seen it in a display case a few weeks ago. A zushi is a small ornate cabinet or shrine used to house sacred objects such as Buddhist statues, scrolls or relics.  I was familiar with a home shrine called a butsudan during my brief stint as a Nichoran Shoshu Buddhist many years ago.  It is a larger cabinet you keep in your home to chant to. A zushi is more of a portable, travel version.

My new zushi has a Bishamonten figure in it. He is sort of the Buddhist god of war (which kind of defeats the underlying principle of Buddhism). He is one of the Four Heavenly Kings and is associated with protection from evil, victory in battle and overcoming obstacles and wealth, prosperity and good fortune.

He's no black cat, but I'm hoping he will bring some magic into my aging life.

I have a creamsicle

 

It is National Creamsicle Day and I dreamt up a bicycle made up of creamsicles.  It's a bit more exciting than the design I dreamt up last year.

I didn't sell any of those either. Apparently although there is a National Creamsicle Day, there isn't a big Creamsicle contingent looking for creamsicle merch.

I try drumming up business by posting on Bluesky, Instagram, Facebook and Threads. I get a few likes but no purchases. Kind of sucks. I was kind of hoping I would be successful on Printify and be able to flip off Teepublic and Redbubble. I do spitefully wish they would both go out of business. The thought of the worms who work on their legal teams trying to get another job after practicing t-shirt law.  appeals to me. I can be pretty vindictive.

Good thing I'm not president of the United States or I would be sending the National Guard into Teepublic and Redbubble headquarters and there would be a passel of ex-lawyers slapping mosquitos in a dirty bunk somewhere in Florida.

Down from the Mountain

 

There was something about this photo taken on Space Mountain at Disneyland that seemed very Biblical to me. I removed the images of the other people in the vehicle (including my wife curled up in a fetal position next to me) to emphasize how much I look like Michelangelo's image of god on the Sistine Chapel.

Of course god isn't wearing bifocals in the painting because he probably didn't have good vision benefits like I do at my place of employment. But then again, I suppose the almighty doesn't really need a good HMO or Medicare. 

After going on all of the rides at Disneyland, I am glad I have good benefits. Between the heat, standing in long lines and being jerked around unmercifully because I insist on sticking my hands in the air on roller coasters to prove how brave I am, I can barely walk.

One more day in the Happiest Place on Earth and I think I would be visiting Jehova.

Yahweh, right.
 

Hard to hold a candle to

You can now buy very expensive candles and frisbees from my Printify store. Although they look pretty cool, I'm not convinced too many people will shell out the big bucks for them.

I think the frisbee retails for about $47 which is a bit pricey for something your dog is just going to chew up and spit all over. The candles are only $33. It's still a bit pricey, but they have a spiritual angle to them. People will pay extra to earn points with god.

At least that is my theory. I am just grateful that my survival does not depend upon selling any of this shit...I mean unique merch that will fulfill most people's shallow and baseless lives.