Tuesday, May 01, 2018

Let the wolves enjoy my bones


When I die, let the wolves enjoy my bones
When I die, let me go
When I die, let the wolves enjoy my bones
When I die, let me go  
When I die, you can push me out to sea
When I die, set me free
When I die, let the sharks come round to feed
When I die, set me free
Oh the world is dark,
and I've looked as far I can see
When the years have torn me apart.
Let me be  
When I die, let the flames devour me
When I die, set me free
When I die, throw my ashes to the breeze
When I die, scatter me  
Whole world is dark, and I've looked as far as I can see
When the years have torn me apart 
Let me be
Let me be
Let me be
Let me be 
Daylight is waiting for you
Daylight is waiting for you
Daylight is waiting for you
Daylight is waiting for you
--Down Like Silver, Wolves
I have been listening to Pandora a lot lately.  Sure, I have to listen to ads and I can't listen to the exact songs I like, but I can listen to songs that are similar to the songs I like. And that is how I discover gems like the song above that I am obsessed with. It's by singing duo Down Like Silver. It is a haunting song that apparently came out in 2011. But I just discovered it and wonder why the world isn't listening to it. They have other great songs, including one called, Idaho (go figure...neither of them is from Idaho. But Wolves is the one that messes with my soul.


There is another singing duo I discovered around the same time as I discovered Down Like Silver. It is called The Sweeplings and I am quickly becoming obsessed with all of their songs, but especially a song called, Carry Me Home.
Carry me home when the light in my eyes does fade
Carry me home when the shadow comes to take me away
Lay down my bones knowing I'll be in a better place
Release my soul, carry me home 
Carry me home there's no sorrow down in the ground
Carry me home don't you weep for I am freedom bound
Lay down my bones there is peace within the light I've found
Release my soul, carry me home
Now I know what you are thinking, both of these songs are a bit melancholy and dark (and these are just the lyrics...wait until you actually listen to the music and haunting voices). And you are absolutely right. But I have always been drawn to haunting music. Both these songs have a ethereal quality to them that moves me. Ironically they are both sung by relatively young people who really shouldn't be at a place where they are pondering on the disposition of their bones.

I, at 60, am closer to that head space, though as I calculated in a recent post, I've probably got a at least 20 more years before I am ready to feed to the wolves.

Now who knows what these duos were thinking when they wrote these songs, but to me they speak to me of the country. And I'm not talking about our country or a country. I'm talking about the feel of country. Or at least the country I felt in my youth growing up in Idaho. I felt the sad whispers of my ancestors as I sat on the front steps on muggy August nights listening to crickets and distant train whistles.

My ancestors were farmers and farm hands, clawing at the dirt at the turn of the century as they migrated from the mid-west to Idaho. They stared into the face of poverty during the Great Depression. And my uncles ran from by joining the army or marines and being shipped far from the dust and fields to the jungles of the South Pacific.

I would listen to country in the voices of my aunts and uncles. The slow drawl of people who lived hard lives. Their measured speech doled out words. I was drawn to their lives but distant from them. I didn't grow up on a farm. By the time I was born, the city had eaten up the farm land for sub-divisions and tract homes. But it wasn't that distant from me both figuratively and literally. I lived with the ghosts of country life.

So Wolves and Carry Me Home tug at those feelings. I live and work in an area that is about as urban as you can get. So I sometimes long for country.

Though I know enough about country not to overly romanticize it. Country is hard and raw. But Wolves and Carry Me Home speak to me of redemption and release. It's not about death as much as returning to the earth and leaving the material behind.

They are welcome sounds to me after all of the clutter that bombards us in this digital age. But ironically it is this digital age that has brought me full circle to my roots in country.

I take hope in the thought that daylight is waiting for us all.
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