I came home this evening and discovered a squirrel had gone medieval on my self-portrait jack-o-lantern. This is the first time in all of the years I've been carving pumpkins that I've ever seen anything like this.
Perhaps my face just enraged the squirrel. I sometimes have that effect on people. Or I suppose the squirrel could have mistaken the pumpkin for Richard Roundtree, Silent Bob or Dom DeLuise and flew into a rabid rage. Others made that mistake when they first saw it.
Maybe the squirrel was just jealous of my artwork and like most critics, defaced it rather than accept my genius.
Or he was pretty hungry.
Regardless, I'm more than just a little nervous about stepping outside and having a crazed squirrel leap on me and start gnawing on my face thinking I'm a pumpkin. Or worse yet, he could go for my nuts.
Oh come on, I'm talking about the bag of peanuts I sometimes keep in my pocket.
Perverts.
13 comments:
More power to the squirrel!
Rather a dapper digger you are.
Do you have dual flush?
Oh my husband is cackling in glee about the fact that you referenced his Dom DeLuise comment (what a dork!) I told him you are NOTHING like DD, especially in girth, but apparently the squirrels don't give a damn if you're Dom D. or Johnny Depp -- they're just looking for some free squash! (Can you blame them??)
Either that, or they really want your nuts.
Thanks for taking the squirrel's side Whitesnake. I have a a dual flush. I can use my hands or my feet to flush.
JP, Thanks for not thinking I physically resemble Dom. I'm just hoping it is a squirrel and not the neighbor's kids.
Footpad, That is a distinct possibility, so I'm wearing a cup when I'm out cleaning up leaves.
well, you've done it. If there was anything more disturbing than your face carved on a pumpkin, it is that same face eaten by squirrels. i need more coffee.
The chitterbox was making a sacrifice in the name of his squirrelian overlords. Next? World domination.
Hayden,
Sticks and stones...sticks and stones.
Kristy, I have always been a supporter of squirrels. But this one was gnawing off my nose to spite my face.
Clearly those are chipmunk gnaw marks. I don't know why you are so quick to blame the squirrels. Probably a guilty conscience from some previous squirrely transgression.
Leather Squirrel, You're nuts if you think a chipmunk chewed my pumpkin. I've never even seen a chipmunk in the Seattle area. So maybe a dingo ate your baby, too. So there.
See, that's the thing about chipmunks, you never see them, you never hear them, you go along as if there's no chipmunks in your area and then one day, WHAM: gnawed pumpkins. Nasty little beggers.
I wonder if my wearing my TIM ID mask everytime I shot squirrels around here might have anything to do with it........
This from a squirrel who wears a leather hood.
THE Michael,
Sounds like I'm not the only one who needs to protect his nuts.
Footpad, I knew it couldn't have been a chipmunk.
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