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Sunday, November 19, 2006

Nothing


Writing about nothing really is nothing. I'd hazard a guess that many people write about nothing effortlessly and are oblivious that they have written about nothing. I, however, write about nothing, deliberately and effortlessly. Now that is something.

A paradox perhaps?

Actually it's years of practise. My years as a freelance writer honed my ability to write about nothing with authority. I can also read any magazine and spot the professional writers who write about nothing and make it appear that it is something and that they are experts about it. This is why you can read these articles about weight loss, finding a job or becoming rich and not realize the writer has told you absolutely nothing in about 1500 words.

Knowing nothing is an artform. I am an artist of nothing. That is why I get annoyed when amateurs write about nothing with conviction. You may think you know nothing, but you don't know nothing.

But nothing ventured, nothing gained.

I am feeling very Zen like now.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

I have nothing to comment about.

Time said...

Whitesnake,
Well, that's something...

Anonymous said...

Great. Now I feel I'm not qualified to write about nothing. If you're not qualified to write about nothing, what can you possibly be qualified to write about? Besides bestiality, I mean.

Time said...

Kristy, On the contrary, as an English major and former English teacher, you are actually more qualified to write about nothing and do it grammatically. I thought I'd just dangle that little particple out there for some thoughts about nothing.

Anonymous said...

Ain't noone better at writing nuthin than you.

You recent photoshop has been exceptionally brilliant Tim.

Time said...

Thanks Shandi, I've been told my entire life that I'm better at nothing than most people.

Time said...

Lights, That means nothing to me.

Anonymous said...

I have always been a firm believer that everyone is a genius at something, so perhaps your genius lies in nothing. If that's the case then you're really onto something....

Time said...

Miss Bliss, If there is genius in nothing than I am Einstein.