Saturday, June 02, 2007

Interview with the Tim


Hayden taunted me with another meme with these rules:

Directions for the Interview Meme:
1. Leave me a comment saying "Interview Me."
2. I will respond by asking you 5 questions. (I get to pick the questions.)
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them 5 questions.

I of course took the bait. Here is her interview with me:

1) When you are day dreaming, where do you most often go – (past, present, future) and what do you do there?

When I day dream, I generally return to the past and relive happy times or rewrite scripts of things I would have done differently. I attend different colleges and earn different degrees. I take different jobs and take different chances. Sometimes I daydream that I am different people. When I was a boy, I imagined I was one of the Beatles. I would also put myself in various heroes’ roles from movies I’d seen. The beauty of day dreaming is that you can become anything: better looking, rich, successful and talented. I have day dreamed all those things.

2) If you could take your gnome anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?

I’d take the little bugger on one of those expeditions down to visit the wreck of the Titanic. Then I’d use one of the robot arms to place him on the bow of the wreck with a sign around his neck that reads: I’M THE KING OF THE WORLD! This would just be for the benefit of the gnome, mind you.
If it were a place I wanted to go, it would be either the Great Pyramids in Egypt, the French West Indies on a Windjammer Barefoot Cruise (preferably the Polynesian) or walking down Royal Street in New Orleans on my way to St. Louis Cathedral to watch the street performers and artists.

3) You’ve found a magic bottle with a djinn in it. It’s a very old djinn, and while his magic is still powerful, his willingness is weak. He grants you only one wish. What is it?

Any kid who has ever thought about this question will tell you the correct wish is to wish for more wishes. But since there seems to be lots of policies, disclaimers and caveats in the djinn world, I suppose I couldn’t get away with that. I suppose then I would wish for unlimited monetary wealth without constraints or penalties. Because, although money can’t buy you love, it can buy you freedom, security and the ability to provide for your loved ones.

If for some reason I couldn’t get that wish, I would wish for the ability to become invisible at will. Because I think invisibility could also provide freedom, security and the ability to provide for your loved ones.

4) If you could be any character in history, who would it be and why?

Cyrano de Bergerac. He was heroic, he was romantic, he was poetic, he was strong and he was beautiful on the inside. He just wasn’t beautiful on the outside. He lived in a romantic time where great gestures and honor were more important than superficial things. Plus I always wanted to be a great swordsman and swashbuckler.

5) You have been granted infinite power to change one thing in your life. What is it that you change, and why?

Again with the one thing. I suppose then, I would eliminate self-doubt. It stands in the way of so much in our lives and prevents us from reaching our potential. Eliminating my double chin would be a close runner up.

Bonus question: is there anything that you would hesitate to put your face on, and why or why not?

I am assuming you are referring to Photoshopping my face on things, and not literally putting my face on things. The answers would be substantially different. I have Photoshopped my face on whale vomit, pumpkins, Kim chi stew, quesadillas and head cheese. But I would not put my face on George W. Bush. Even I have standards.
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