Tuesday, July 03, 2007

Let's get liquored up and set things on fire!

I am not particularly fond of holidays in the middle of the week. It’s like having two Monday’s in one week. Oh I suppose you could say it’s like having two Fridays, too. But that just means you don’t feel like doing anything for two days that you have to make up for on the two additional Mondays.

There is a certain logic here somewhere.

I think all holidays should be on Mondays or Fridays. I think it would improve productivity because you’d have less people calling in sick to stretch the midweek holiday into the weekend. It would also help the economy by providing consistent three-day weekends for every holiday that people could party hearty on.

The Fourth of July is an odd holiday anyway. In theory it is supposed to commemorate the adoption of the Declaration of Independence from England. But technically, the Declaration of Independence wasn’t officially signed by most members of the Continental Congress until August 2. Celebrating the 2nd of August apparently didn’t have the same ring to it as the 4th of July.

Regardless, I think most Americans think that the 4th of July is just another excuse to get liquored up and set things on fire…often themselves. Ironically most of the holidays celebrated in the United States seem to be an excuse to get liquored up and set things on fire. We even celebrate other country’s holidays just so we can get liquored up and set things on fire (St. Patrick’s Day and Cinco de Mayo for example).

Shoot, I think we need to create a new holiday called, “Get Liquored Up and Set Things on Fire Day.” It could be held on the third Monday or Friday of whatever months we don’t have another holiday scheduled in to get liquored up on and set things on fire. They may already have this holiday in many of our southern states, but I am suggesting making it a nationwide thing.

Don’t you wish I was in charge of the country?
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