Tuesday, May 16, 2006

The Lostness Blogger

Sometimes I take more liberties with the English language than a sportscaster. But in my post about being lost and enjoying the television series LOST, I responded to Shandi's comment that I was glad she understood my "lostness." That escalated to the Lostness Blogger and you know I can't resist an opportunity to put my face on things.

But it made me think about the Loch Ness monster. It also made me think about bigfoot, the abominable snowman (not the abdominal snowman...that would be hard to stomache) and cabin stewards on cruise ships. What do they all have in common? They supposedly exist, but you rarely catch a glimpse of them.

I have to go on record that I don't believe in any of them (okay, maybe cabin stewards). The world has just become too small for anything to escape notice. You can bet if bigfoot existed, the park service would be charging them an overnight fee for camping. And in a society where the government can snap a satellite photo of your car in your driveway from several miles up and be able to read your license plate, why can't one person take a clear photo of any of the world's missing links?

Okay, someone is going to cite a new species of monkey recently being discovered in Africa as an example of something escaping discovery for years. My response is: Gee, someone didn't notice that one of the monkeys in Africa was smaller than the rest and had an overbite. Big whoop. Go to a Walmart and you'll discover lots of creatures you swear are new species of human...sort of.

I think it is just human nature to want to believe there are still mysteries in the world. And I believe there are mysteries left in the world, just not in Loch Ness or walking around in the rain forests of the Pacific Northwest leaving size 18 foot prints.

That's just my opinion, but if you do have any clear photos of Loch Ness monster or bigfoot, shoot them over to me. I'd love to Photoshop my face on them.


Hayden said...

o my. I am worried now. abdominal snowmen? like, running around with really really well-developed six-pacs encased in snow?

I'm so lost. what happened to the good old fashioned yeti with a grainy video of you in their family room projection unit?

Hayden said...

I'm sorry. I just can't stop there. A muscular Yeti? they always looked kinda' stooped and bumbling to me, never thought of them as abdominal specimens. Not exactly popin-fresh, but pokeable. my my my. I just don't know what to think anymore. Is there a Yeti workout DVD routine they could bring to the homo sapiens world? something new we haven't tried before, but is a secret known to the Yeti for millenia? perhaps with a diet plan in the attached CD?
*shakes head and wanders away, wondering*

Time said...

I'm not sure the world is Yeti for it.

Alex Pendragon said...

If one had to pin down exactly what Nessy was supposed to be, the pleaosaur fits the bill exactly, at least in construction, yet the pleasaur was understood to be a reptile, and could not have existed in that frigid water. So maybe the dinosaurs WERE warm blooded.....well, then Nessy had to have had a harem somewhere in an underwater cave system far beneath the surface. Perhaps if that were the case, then it is quit possible that pleaosaurs DID exist there until human pressure and lack of adequate food resources finally led it to extinction in OUR lifetime, but not before we recorded sightings of it.

Bigfoot? Maybe......but I doubt it, but then again, Japanese soldiers held out quite a long time sight unseen for years after the end of WWII. If a missing link like Bigfoot knows the expanses of terrain they are claimed to inhabit as well as any half-assed intelligent being would, then it is quite possible the same concept applies. Perhaps Bigfoot is smart enough to know that contact with humans is the ultimate no-no. Bob knows legends of creatures have discovered that fact the hard way.

Naughti Biscotti said...

Still laughing. I knew you couldn't resist. I knew that was just too bloggable to pass up.

I grew up in the woods of the Pacific Northwest. Our community made money off the stories... and the stupid tourists who believed them. We even had a summer celebration called "Bigfoot Days". I've got several photos of bigfoot from my home town. Maybe I'll blog them.

Time said...

THE Michael, uh...okay.

Shandi, Yeah, it was too good of a blogging opportunity to pass up. I think the Loch Ness monster also serves as a revenue stream for that Scotland community. It's kind of their Area 51.

darlingina said...

Thanks for making me smile today Tim. Your post was just what i needed.

Time said...

Gina, happy to help!

Lights, I do believe in the Memorial Day Ferret.