Wednesday, April 12, 2006

We all shine on...

What circus sideshow is complete with out a mindreader, hypnotist or fortune teller? And who at one time or another hasn't wanted to be able to read minds? But upon extended reflection, would you really, truly want to know what people think of you?

I wouldn't. I can hardly stand knowing what I think of myself without being bombarded with other people's uncensored opinions of me. I think it would be a major burden to have to deal with other's thoughts (and I've obviously given this lots of thought).

But being a Pisces, I am pretty much required to at least entertain the thought that, although not a mindreader, I do have some psychic abilities. No, I can't move things with my mind or bend spoons (which I've always thought was kind of a stupid thing to waste your psychic powers on if you do have them). I am, however, pretty intuitive and on many levels an empath. I think that is what being psychic really comes down to -- being more aware of non-verbal clues.

Now I do occasionally play a game of trying to guess which elevator is coming or what suitcase on "Deal or No Deal" has the $10,000 in it that you can win at home. But I seem to have better luck predicting things when I'm not trying to. I definitely don't have luck predicting lottery numbers, winning race horses or the winner of the Super Bowl (but if those refs weren't idiots, I could have said I predicted the latter).

Despite my own minor psychic tendencies, I have a healthy mistrust for people who claim to be psychics, especially for money. For one, if you did have strong enough abilities to predict futures why would you set up shop in the worst part of town in a mobile home with a neon sign that says, "MADAME ZARA'S PSYCHIC READINGS AND HAIR EXTENSIONS." And there is that old joke about wondering why you would need an appointment for a psychic reading. Shouldn't the psychic know you are coming?

I have to admit I did go to a few psychic fairs in my younger days. But I am just too much of a smart ass to sit back and let someone heal my aura for $10. I would keep saying crap like, "I think you missed a spot" or "Do you have anything in blue?" Trust me. Aura healers do not have a sense of humor. More than once I came away with my aura plucked so close to my body that it took months to retain its glow.

Fortunately, I never fell for the 1-800 psychic networks. Okay, I think it is one thing to actually talk to a person in person and get some kind of vibe from them. But I draw the line on anything that involves spiritual direction via a telephone line. I imagine they will one day have these phone trees for psychics: "Press one if you wish to have your palm read, two for a tarot card reading, three to analyze your Astrological chart and four to communicate with the dead. Please note that communicating with the dead requires additional long distance fees."

When it comes down to it, knowing the future is like knowing what people are actually thinking about you. It sounds good until you actually hear it. Because human nature being what it is, most of us wouldn't want the cards we are dealt and would likely look for another psychic who would predict a better future.

But I will end this post with a small but very accurate prediction. Some people will agree with what I've just written, and some won't.

Uncanny, isn't it?
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